Is this really happening? [Adrian]

[HERMIONE JEAN GRANGER]

[

It was just another one of those days, where Hermione found herself spending hours and hours in the library. Even after the ball, things had not changed too much, save for one thing that would probably be mean more to her friends than it really bothered her. Hermione sat there in one of the back corners, near a window, curled up on a small sofa in the reading area. She had piles and piles of books around her, mostly for light reading and some to help her with her essay that she’d have to turn in in a few weeks. However, at that point, Hermione was lost in thought, the feather tip of the quill resting at her lips while she stared out the window, book lying open on her lap. She had gone to that ball with Adrian simply to make Ron jealous. She wasn’t really sure if it had worked or not, they hadn’t mentioned anything about the ball since it had happened, but throughout the night Hermione had found herself actually somewhat enjoying Adrian’s company, much to her surprise. She passed it off as just playing the part – for he certainly had to have been playing a part with her. At that point, she would have been positive that he would have made fun of it all once he got back to his friends. Except, things had changed. They had left the ball together and talked, for awhile, and at the end of the night he had kissed her. She still wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it, but he had made it clear that he was seeing her differently. Since then they had met up at various points, whether it was on the grounds, or in the library, and just talked for long periods of time. As much as she was hesitant to admit it or even pursue it, Hermione was starting to feel something for him, and that made her nervous. Countless things could go wrong with all of that, and who was to say he really, truly wanted the same?

Hermione sighed a little, blinking out of her thoughts, and returned her gaze to her book and parchment. She scribbled down a few more notes before setting it aside and curling up in a slightly more comfortable position so she could read. Most people didn’t understand how she could read for hours, but it was just something she enjoyed doing. It relaxed her mind, gave her a place to let her thoughts wander to, and helped relieve some of the stress that she dealt with on a day-to-day basis. So much would be changing this next year, she had a gut feeling, and those feelings so far hadn’t steered her in the wrong direction. Now it was just a question of whether or not she was ready for those curveballs that would surely be thrown their way. She didn’t like the fact that Harry’s scar still bothered him, that he still had that connection to Voldemort, and it scared her the way Harry was pulled so deeply into the Dark Lord’s mind. What if Voldemort knew he was there? What if Voldemort turned that against him? There were so many things that could go wrong but she didn’t know how to make Harry see. Did he honestly want that connection to be open? That was trouble just waiting to happen. Hermione wished she could help but all she could think of was that he needed to keep practicing. Dumbledore hadn’t been around as much and things were starting to heat up out there. It was a known fact that Voldemort was back, at least by a handful of people. The Ministry obviously was trying to hush it all up but that was how they always worked. They’d never admit he was back. So where did that leave them? Hermione closed her eyes, leaning her head back against the cool stone. Sometimes she wished that all she had to worry about was school. It’d make life so much simpler.

[/size][/color]

Words693 words.Tagged Vincent Credits to: REAL SLIM SHADY !? @ caution 2.0

[/color]. never say never nottteessss.[/blockquote][/size][/center]

[beth]

• THIS PART OF ME •
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW
THIS PART OF ME
I'LL NEVER SHOW
- - - - - - - - - - - -

The masquerade didn't go at all as Adrian had planned, or even hoped. Pansy seemed to be more disgusted than jealous that he brought Hermione with him, but worse than that, Adrian didn't seem to care. He was happy to be there with Hermione, and was actually grateful he bumped into her that day and asked her out with him. Of course, he knew how absolutely crazy this was. There was everything wrong and nothing right with Hermione and Adrian together. Slytherins and Gryffindors just don't date, never in history had he heard of such madness. And of course, there was the part of it that he was Adrian Alexander Pucey. The guy who swore never to fall in love. . . again. But there he was feeling like an idiot staring up at his ceiling only thinking about Hermione. Sure he still had this small sense that there was something with Pansy, but she didn't care about him anyways. She probably was just going to use him to make her beloved Draco jealous. Adrian's fists curled and he wanted nothing more than to punch that slimy git right in the face and then tell Pansy that she wasn't worth his time anyways. But was Hermione? That was the question that haunted him.

There was something about Hermione Granger that made her attractive to Adrian more than the average girl. It was plain to see she was pretty, even more than that, but it wasn't just her looks for him. Not this time. She was smart and independent, she was different. Most girls threw themselves at guys, but Hermione stood her ground and sort of made them work their way to her. Maybe it was the chase that had Adrian intrigued, or maybe it really was because they had some potential for a real relationship. Adrian didn't know, and was a little too scared to do more research into it. What if he came out with answers he didn't like? Because even though he didn't want to admit it, he relied on his reputation to keep his life at Hogwarts happy. People cowered around him and backed away. He was intimidating, he was feared and respected, but Adrian knew that he would lose all of the power if he started to date a Mudblood -- erm, Muggleborn Gryffindor. Was he willing to throw everything he worked so hard to build away over a girl?

And that was when Adrian Pucey decided that he wasn't. He no longer wanted to take a part in Hermione's life no matter how badly his softer side did. They shared unforgettable moments after the masquerade, and he would surely be haunted by those frail times late at night when he has his worst inner conflicts, but he could deal with that. What he couldn't handle was public ridicule from his fellow Slytherins. He could jump after another girl anyways, wasn't that Greengrass girl a little interested in him? Adrian thought it would be easy to forget Hermione and just move on with his pleasant life as a superior pureblood, but he wasn't so rude to simply stop speaking to Hermione. No, he had the decency to tell her to her that he just couldn't continue on like this. After assuming he'd find the brilliant girl in the library he quickly he made his way up to the fifth floor. Sure enough, he found her sitting in a corner reading. The sight of her burned him a little, and he stopped before making his way to her. His heart sped up and he was hopelessly confused about what was right. He had been told his whole life that one's reputation was everything, and that he had to guard it with everything he had. Hermione would ruin him, and he knew it. Conflicted about what to do, he stood there for a moment before finally deciding to make his way over to her and say, "Hi, Hermione."

WORDS ?! 667
TAGGED ?! Hermione Granger
LYRICS ?! endlessly by muse
TEMPLATE ?! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ?!xD[/size]

[HERMIONE JEAN GRANGER]

[

Her mind continued to wander as she tried to focus on reading, and it seemed her mind was playing tricks on her when she heard the very voice she had been thinking about. Hermione looked up to see Adrian standing there and for a moment, there was a brief flicker of surprise on her features before she took control again. She smiled, although she didn’t move from her curled up position. It was far too comfortable and she didn’t feel like standing. ”Adrian. Nice to see that you haven’t returned to completely ignoring me and you even used my name. Is the world ending?” she teased, not completely regarding him as a cold-hearted Slytherin. It was ever since that masquerade, when she hadn’t been planning on letting her heart get the best of her. He had shown a different side of himself that night, especially in their time alone after the masquerade. Although she wasn’t naïve enough to believe that everything was going to change. She could tell just by the way he was standing there that something was obviously on his mind and she could almost guess what he was going to say. However, she wouldn’t be Hermione Granger if she didn’t have a spine as strong as a brick wall, and a stubborn streak that refused to give in, no matter what. She also didn’t like being proven wrong, which was a completely different topic in itself.

She shifted a little to make room for him on the sofa. ”Here, have a seat, unless you think your friends will see you, but I doubt that. We’re in the farthest reach of the library and none of them would even come near the front of the library, much less all the way back here, at least in broad daylight.”

[/color] she chuckled, not about to let anything he would say bring her down. She should have known that he wouldn’t have the courage to stand up to his friends, to do what he actually wanted. It was how Slytherins were. It was a major difference between Gryffindors and Slytherins, although both houses were ambitious, they had some key differences in their characteristics, especially when it came to standing up for what they believed in. Even if Gryffindors were regarded as foolish sometimes, at least they didn’t let reputation outweigh their heart, at least most of the time. Hermione knew a few Gryffindors who could use a lesson or two in loyalty but then again, no one was perfect. Not even her, although she hated to admit it. Adrian was a good guy, whether he wanted to admit it or not, and Hermione didn’t like to see him so chained down. How was that any fun? So he had a reputation. So he wanted to probably see if he could sleep with every girl in the castle, or at least get them to think they had a chance with them. In Hermione’s opinion, that was all codswallop. ”I promise I don’t bite.”[/color] she smiled, moving to an actual seated position so she wasn’t taking up more of the sofa. Why was it that no matter who she might care for, they never seemed to return those same feelings? One in particular was on her mind, as he was constantly, and she doubted she’d ever not be able to think of him. Except there was the obvious fact that he wasn’t interested in her like that and he’d never feel that way. Maybe she just didn’t want to always be known as ‘the best friend’. Maybe, for once, she wanted something a little more. This whole thing with Adrian obviously didn’t really help things at all, but as she sat there, she resolved to help him. He had shown her that truer side, the side she never knew and never would have expected to have existed, and she wasn’t going to let him throw all that away all for the sake of some silly reputation. Reputations only helped you have friends or not have friends in school. Those mattered little once you were out in the world, especially if you had proven yourself. [/color]

Credits to: REAL SLIM SHADY !? @ caution 2.0[/color]. never say never [/blockquote][/size][/center]

[beth]

• THIS PART OF ME •
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW
THIS PART OF ME
I'LL NEVER SHOW
- - - - - - - - - - - -

As Adrian stood in front of her, he wanted to run back into his dorm room and hide. Confronting her was harder than he thought it would be and he really didn't want to say anything at all. He wanted to sit by her, talk and not have to worry about who saw. Sadly, that wasn't how it could work though. "To be completely fair, Hermione, you never went out of your way to talk to me either." He pointed out gently, before giving her a small smile to assure her he was being light hearted. The smile still felt strained and he didn't know if he should sit by her or remain standing. A million thoughts zipped in and out of his head, and he desperately tried to sort them all. It was so obvious that both Hermione and Pansy were unhealthy for himself and that he should just move on, but the only reason why he pictured them as not good for him was because he cared. It was a feeling he wasn't used to feeling, and he had to admit, it wasn't all too pleasant. Having to worry about someone else and be cautious over their own emotions was tiring. Adrian liked being emotionless and able to step on who ever he wanted when he wanted. It made him Slytherin, and that made him strong. If he was with Hermione, or even Pansy, he would lose that because he would be giving up caring only for himself. He'd have a weakness.

Hermione offered him to sit down with her, telling him that none of his friends would spend time in the library, and she was right. None of his friends would be caught wasting time in the library of all places. After a seconds hesitation, he sat beside her, but was careful to keep an appropriate amount of space. No need to tempt himself. The silence was slowly killing him because Adrian was never the type to beat around the bush. He was straightforward and a little pushy at times, but that's just how he was and it typically worked out for the best in those situations. Before he lost his sanity, he decided to break the silence. "Hermione, what exactly happened between us… I mean, what did happen doesn't make us, you know, official or anything, right? Because I'm sure you wouldn't want to be seen publicly with me, I mean, Slytherins are no good to Gryffindors…" In a totally unAdrian Pucey like manner, he fumbled on words and choked on his thoughts. What he was trying to get at is whether or not she thought they were 'together'. If she did, things could be more difficult than he intended. He figured Hermione was certainly smart enough to know things couldn't take off between them, at least not publicly, but there was a small chance she might. And if that were to be the case, he wasn't sure how to react.

WORDS ?! 509
TAGGED ?! Hermione Granger
LYRICS ?! endlessly by muse
TEMPLATE ?! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ?!xD[/size]

[HERMIONE JEAN GRANGER]

The more Hermione thought about it, the more her logical side began to take over and she was slowly realizing that this wasn’t going to work. Not to mention that a certain other individual was starting to creep into her heart and while wanted to think that she and Adrian might actually work out, it was becoming all too clear that it wouldn’t and she wasn’t going to let herself get pushed around. Even as he made his comment about them ‘not being official’ and all that public nonsense, her anger flared somewhat but she remained calm and simply gave him a smile. It really was too bad that he couldn’t get past his own blindness and that he honestly thought she would have bought everything he said hook line and sinker. Sure, she had really hoped because it would’ve been nice to find someone she could talk to when Ron and Harry were being especially difficult, and Ginny wasn’t always available. Yet it was clear as day now that this wasn’t what he wanted and she would have to accept that.

”You were the one who didn’t want anyone seeing us near each other, I thought it only right that I abide by your wish. And as for ‘us’, there’s no us. There never really was and don’t try to tell me there was.”

she said firmly. As much as it hurt to realize she had nearly fallen for such a ruse, she had to push through it. Besides, there was someone who did care about her and the longer she talked with him, the more she knew that houses didn’t matter as much, at least to that person. Unlike Adrian. ”I thought we had shared something that night, you seemed to open up, and even the other times we spent with each other you seemed to be happier, but I’m not an idiot. You want Pansy, you don’t want me, I was just someone you could use to try and make her jealous and you probably succeeded. I’m not mad at you. I used you to make someone jealous as well, though he didn’t even notice. Figures as much..”[/color] She sighed, leaning back against the back of the couch, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. ”And besides, you have enough girls lined up for you, I’m sure you don’t need someone like me anywhere near you, since that’d only hurt your reputation.”[/color]

She wasn’t trying to be cold, she just didn’t want to be played around with. She had had enough of that. Hermione knew people could change, and people she had thought could never care about anyone but themselves had proven otherwise. She played with the ring on her right hand absent-mindedly, the one he had given her, the one that was unmistakably that of a certain Slytherin, but quickly folded her hands back in her lap when she realized what she was doing. Hermione looked back at Adrian and gave him a soft, somewhat sad smile. ”I do feel bad for you though, that you would let something like a reputation prevent you from doing something you might actually like. I know some people for a fact don’t let that rule their lives but then again, that’s what makes us so very different.”[/color] Sure, she was hurt but she couldn’t let it get to her or affect her more than it already had. It would just make her seem weak, as gullible as any other girl out there, and Hermione was anything but. She stood strong to her beliefs and she did have a big heart, more than some might realize, and she tried not to let it get hurt but sometimes it just couldn’t be helped. ”I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough for you”[/color] she said softly, looking down for a moment.
[/color][/blockquote]

[beth]

• THIS PART OF ME •
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW
THIS PART OF ME
I'LL NEVER SHOW
- - - - - - - - - - - -

"You're being ridiculous, Hermione." Adrian argued, trying not to sound too angry, but she just didn't understand! How could she though? She had never been in his place. Perfection and reputation wasn't a big deal to Hermione Granger. Her friends were not so uptight and didn't care who she hung out with. Adrian grew up his entire life worrying about how to make things appear absolutely in order, like he was really in control. He put up with his infuriating brother, got decent grades, and became the charming pureblood son his father wanted. Adrian Pucey put his heart and soul into being the best, and he never wanted anything to come in between that. He didn't expect to meet Pansy and fall for her only to get rejected, he didn't want to ask Hermione to the dance and then wind up falling for her too. But he did, and now he didn't know where to go. "Just because I didn't want a public relationship -- like I'm sure you wouldn't want either -- doesn't mean I don't care about you." Adrian said the words more angrily than he intended, but he wasn't sure how else to get this out. Emotions and ooey, gooey feelings were never his style.

Adrian knew all along that Hermione was a beyond brilliant girl. She read between the lines and saw even the smallest of details. And for some idiotic reason, it still stung him when she exploited his original plan. He listened to her, and felt the hurt in her words. There was so much he wanted to say, but he wasn't sure if he would be able to get it out. Still, he had to try. "Okay, you're right. That was my first intention when I asked you; I wanted to make Pansy jealous, but as the night when on, I stopped even bothering to see if Pansy was watching us mainly because I was rather jealous watching you watch that redhead. " Adrian trailed off, running his fingers through his hair. It made him feel lower than low to be jealous of that Weasley kid. Weasley was poor and a pathetic excuse for a pureblood, but he had Hermione's heart, obviously, and that was what got under Adrian's skin the most. "I… I like you, Hermione. I just don't know how to make it work with us." It was more than clear that they both had distinct feelings for other people -- people who would be far better suited than each other -- but Adrian wasn't sure if that was good enough for him. He had seen what it was like on the other side, past all of the prejudices and grudges, and he wasn't sure if he'd be able to go back.

His eyes fell down to the floor as Hermione said she felt bad for him, that his pride kept away any pleasure from his life. But what hurt even more than that was she thought it was her that he didn't want. In all of his seventeen years, he had never heard anything more untrue and just absolutely wrong. Hermione had nothing to do with this equation, it was all on Adrian's shoulders. He didn't know how to get over himself and love someone. Maybe because he was scared, or maybe because he was a fool. He wasn't sure. Trying to make it clear to Hermione, he quickly said, "Don't say that. It's not you at all. You're beautiful and brilliant, down-to-earth, just perfect. I would be lucky if you were interested in me, Hermione. You're so much better than myself, and maybe that's what makes this so difficult." Adrian wasn't just sweet-talking her when he said this, he meant everything. Hermione was worth ten of himself no matter her blood. She was a solidly good person, and all this time he had been a coward. Adrian was just starting to see this, but he didn't know how to make himself change. Maybe he wouldn't have to do it alone; if Hermione would give him a chance, he might have her to help.

WORDS ?! 724
TAGGED ?! Hermione Granger
LYRICS ?! endlessly by muse
TEMPLATE ?! PANIC! ITS LAUZ @ CAUTION
NOTES ?!xD[/size]